there was no easter bunny this year

nor was there any mention of one. i think that's the first time in my life. i can honestly say i didn't miss it. my sister and i chuckled over my joking of it though. i had asked if the easter bunny came 'round. she said no. she is 16 and i know full well she understands the fairy tale of the easter bunny, knowing it's not real in the least. when she said no, i told her that i had some bad news. "the easter bunny was hit by a semi truck earlier this morning. squashed to a bloody pulp, he was. i'm sorry holly. there won't be an easter bunny this year or from now on." we both laughed. she knew that i knew she didn't believe in the easter bunny and that i also was only saying the intentional brutal story to get a laugh out of us both. i appreciate her.

it apppears my mother did not go into her work today as she thought she might. i'm glad of that. she works too much anyway and i had a feeling that her going into work was really her running away from something else - namely family. i don't feel my mother's self esteem is very high right now. hopefully, the nice weather, the sun shining, good food, my father brother and sister, and the greatness of christ's resurrection have lifted that some. holly tells me that mother made food and everyone ate it. usually, though, we go out to the farm. my grandmother still went out and some cousins from out of town were back, too. funny still, that mom didn't go. i wonder what's eating at her? she's not one to talk of these things...pretty closed off like the rest of my family.

i was late to the greeter position this morning. i didn't sleep worth a damn last night. even though i got out of bed with plenty of time to spare, i spent too much time worrying over what to wear. yes. really. i don't have much of a wardrobe and was being self-conscious about what to wear. i felt bad for having to wear a shirt i wore a week and a half ago. and after trying on something else, and going back and forth, back and forth, jonathan asked if i was watching the time. i was. but it was a gentle kick in the pants. thanks jg.

the service was great. for years i've heard the exact same easter service at my parents' catholic church. i can quote some parts by heart. that's sad. sad because it hasn't changed. "so you don't believe that jesus really rose from the dead, huh? you say he couldn't have because of this? or he couldn't have because of that?" wait! wait! mr priest. i DO believe he rose from the dead. why are you being straight out accusational? and you do this every year. okay... back to grace chapel, lincoln, nebraska, the 8th of april 2007. the breakfast between services was amazing. thanks to all who chipped in with that. we sang jesus loves me and this little light of mine with the kiddies in children's church. jake and i went to the hsu's after plans (or lack of plans) fell through with the smith's. jake, you worry me some times. you can be awfully quiet. at times, i'm hesitant to begin talking. that's okay. you'll open up in due time. i'm glad you came along and hope you were full. it was fun playing with the kids there. i'm looking forward to a nap. and then i'll eat some more. probably check email at that time, too. then off to dance the night away. boy oh boy! full days are the best. i can't wait to hear how everyone's easter went. i bet everyone had a blast! cheers . . ..