no more text messages

i'm dropping off the text message radar screen. my latest bill from sprint included this little mention, "text messages will go up in cost from $.08 to $.15". yeah. i'm not paying that. and i've always preferred hearing your voice to reading:

UR CUL! C U L8R

for those whom have sent text messages as of late, i apologize for not sending one in return. cheers . . ..

30apr07 today's quote

there are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. it is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. as the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. when the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. under no circumstances can the food be omitted.

-from the miss manners' guide to excruciatingly correct behaviour-

29apr07 today's quote

our thoughts are unseen hands shaping the people we meet. whatever we truly think them to be, that's what they'll become for us.

-richard cowper-

28apr07 today's quote

you can go a long way with a smile. you can go a lot farther with a smile and a gun.

-al capone-

i think bored is the term used here

i'm bored. i don't want to sit. i want to DO something, something that requires movement, and the use of energy, and brain power. i could invent something. even if it was a rifle, or sword, out of tree branch. or a conversation that two people who are just walking down the street are having. or a game, with rules that obviously need to be thought out more and fine-tuned but not caring about that. or a spur of the moment destination to go to. yeah! now that sounds like fun. but i fear i don't have people whom with which to engage in these activities. ho hum. rumor has it brook talsma's having people gather on the morrow at the starlite lounge in the evening. the starlite is in the haymarket below buzzard billy's. the gathering will be held in brook's honor, whom is celebrating a birthday on tuesday. cheers . . ..

27apr07 today's quote

we cannot always build the future for our youth, but we can build our youth for the future.

-franklin delano roosevelt-

african or european?

http://www.style.org/unladenswallow/

someone took the time. wow! cheers . . ..

26apr07 today's quote

think of bicycles as rideable art that can just about save the world.

-grant petersen-

i have no desire to blog today

that's right. not the least, not even a hint of a desire... to blog, anyway.



but to talk. now that's a different story.

i don't want to type the words on a computer. i want to speak them and they be received by a set of ears.

or sets of ears.

i want the comfort and safety to BAWL MY EYES OUT.

to keep talking through the tears and saliva and snot.

i want to be embraced.

with honesty.

with love.


i want a connection to be made in that moment of vulnerability that SCREAMS understanding.


because THAT is REAL life.

it's not fake, or hollow, or transparent.


and it's necessary.




cheers . . ..

25apr07 today's quote

for in the true nature of things, if we rightly consider, every green tree is far more glorious than if it were made of gold and silver.

-martin luther-

it appears a couple of friends are famous

famous enough to have their photos appear in an art museum. check these photos out!


these are actually photos i took with my mobile at scott and gina's one night. i found this fun little site where you can upload a photo and it "puts it in a museum". here's the link to the site: http://www.dumpr.net/museumr.php?

it rained ALL NIGHT. i kept waking up to it hitting the roof. i'd clammer to the window sill and look out expecting to see a flood carrying cars, cows, and tree limbs away. i like rain. it makes green more green. cheers . . ..

24apr07 today's quote

i like trees because they seem more resigned to the way they have to live than other things do.

-willa cather

my 31 1/2 hour day

it was long.
it was tiring.
it was fun.

the day started saturday morning at 6:30. i had awoken from only 4 1/2 hours of sleep. the night prior, ben taylor and i had went to the zoo bar. we heard some really good blues music. my friend paul was there so he got to meet ben. some ladies there bought me a drink, just out of the blue. it was fruity. back to saturday...

admittedly, i showed up to men's prayer group a little on the tired side. prayer group was good. scott seebohm is going to south korea in a week. wow! afterward, i had a nice little chat with roark. he just happened to be at the church, cleaning up for a wedding that afternoon. then i left to hang out with jonathan. i should let it be known that i had expected saturday to be a looooong day based on how many things were going on and what i had scheduled.

jonathan and i, though roomies, don't always spend enough time together. our schedules are misaligned. that's nothing new to me, having lived with nathaniel and roark before. i really value the time with jonathan and wish there was some more schedule alignment during the weeks. well, he was making pies for a gathering he was going to later that night. the house smelled very good. we discussed our days and what we had planned to be doing. we sat down and prayed together. did i eat a bowl of cereal? i don't remember. i'd say it wasn't quite 11:15am yet. off to joie's.

joie had asked if i would help her with a support letter she is working on. she wanted to add some pictures of children and orphanage stuff to the letter. she's going to guatemala this summer! she shared a banana (with peanut butter) and a smoothie. we hunted around online to find a picture of guatemala. we found one and tried to resize it a little but were having some difficulty using the program that was on brook's laptop. i managed to find a map of guatemala and erase the words and the surrounding countries. next, i drew an outline around the country with a paintbrush tool. i took bits of the outline out by using the paintbrush tool with the white color. the end result looks really nice. it took awhile to do though. and then, looking around for pictures of people and lifestyle in guatemala, joie and i ran across a picture of guatemala that was nothing more than a black outline of the shape of it. we laughed. it was what we were looking for and had we found it earlier, we'd not have had to do the amount of work we already did. lol. sometimes it works out that way. she printed off the picture i had worked on so i could take it with me and come up with some ideas. the next event on the list was the nebrasks vs texas baseball game. i headed towards the haymarket.

i parked under the o street overpass, hoped i'd not get a parking ticket (i didn't pay the meter), and began walking. immediately, i saw aaron and amber. they actually saw me first. they were also going to the game. not a block away, i saw tim shrog getting out of his car. we chatted briefly. he was going to scooter's. i think jonathan saw him there later. not quite a block away again, i ran into a bartender from o'rourke's. he was at the oven having lunch with his wife and son. we chatted briefly also. i was excited at having run into all these random encounters. and then, about a block and a half this time, melissa hieder calls out my name. she was at maggie's with kaysha (did i say that name right?). to review, that's four unexpected encounters within three blocks. wow! there are so many lives going on at the same time.

i should have gotten a nasty, greasy, ketchup mustard relish onions mayonaise and pickle smothered hot dog from a vendor in the haymarket but i was too focused on getting a place to sit on the grass in the general admission section. i was to save spots for dave magee, aaron and amber, ben davy, and dave's father (who is hilarious!) and younger brother. elijah was there with family tailgating but i knew if i walked through the parking to find him, i'd not get a good place to sit. turns out he was already inside the ballpark. i saw him after i sat down. there was a strong breeze from the south. i remember watching a bird try to fly into it. the bird started just past the third base line and flew until it was out of energy. he made it to about first base. poor guy. he had to rest. but then later, he tried it again. he should have just walked and he would have gotten to where he was going faster. amber commented that the day was absolutely perfect for a baseball game. i agreed. i said it was also perfect for sailing. i left just before the fifth inning, just as jesse davy showed up. it's a nebraska game. in nebraska. a sea of red. up walks jesse in a GREEN shirt. it was awesome. you could have spotted him anywhere. i had about 20 minutes to get to john's piano recital/lecture.

i was a little late. melissa hieder was waiting outside the recital hall. there was a sign that said "do not enter until applause". i didn't want to miss anything though. then mike freitag showed up. then adam parks showed up. i opened the door and walked in just as john was getting up from the piano and walking (my direction) to the podium. i hope it didn't throw him off or anything. it didn't sound like it did. john is really good on the piano. he's a smart kid and it showed by the research he had done. afterwards, everyone was invited to a meal at embassy suites. IT WAS AWESOME! and not just the food either. the time with people was really good. i thoroughly enjoyed being there and i laughed a lot. there was no clock to be found in the recital hall or in the banquet hall in embassy suites. i had no idea what time it was and that was a good thing. i didn't want to start feeling tired any earlier than necessary. jay and liz invited me over to look at engagement photos so that is where i went next.

dave magee had taken the photos for them. they were taken at pioneer's park. and they are very good. it was good to sit with jay and liz as they were being shown to me and getting their commentary on them. i can't wait 'till october 20th. weeeeeeeeee!

i decided to go to meadowlark and be somewhat still and quiet for a while before heading over to the davy's. what was it? about 8pm then? many commented that i had gotten some sun. my friend laura was there. she told me a bunch of her friends were going to be at 80's night so i had to be there. i assured her i would. then i ordered a carmel machiato and downloaded some songs in an attempt to rebuild my music library. i was invited to a party out in the country north of town but had to decline. within an hour of showing up, i left.

north! to the davy's! full speed ahead! i was anxious to watch a movie on ben's bigscreen. there were a number of people there. we watched a couple of monty python skits and listened to slam poetry too. crystal told me that yet more money was received for the talent show. holy cow! something like $1200 - $1300 total now. god gives. again, holy cow! i found out that nebraska lost the baseball game. the movie played that night was the incredible hulk. it was a good time because of all the commentary. lol. everything wrapped up about 1am-ish. okay. so now i've been up for 18 1/2 hours. any normal person would have been going home to bed.

with the exception of meadowlark (which still wasn't time for just me by myself), i now had time to slow down. you see, i was helping the andersons with their sunday morning paper route. they were out of town and had trouble finding someone to do it. i told them i could help them out. mark said i had to pick up the papers from the lincoln journal star downtown, insert various things, fold them, and bag them. with my time to kill, i wanted to eat. deleon's, YEAH! but there was at least 8 cars ahead of me. so i settled for amigo's. :yuck: and pulled into the lincoln journal star parking lot about twenty to 2am. the weather was absolutely perfect. 2 rolled around and i got in line with those already there. since i'd not been through this before, i watched what others were doing. i did the same. when i was given my papers i rolled my cart over to a table and then went to get the inserts and the comics. there weren't any bags and i was scared to ask for them because i thought they'd charge the andersons some how. well, that's not how it works. bags probably cost $.0001 apiece, so they gave them freely (get it? freely? ha ha ha). i stuffed, folded, and bagged about 140 papers. and sunday papers are the biggest. my hands were blackened with newspaper ink. i was about to leave. the people there doing what was routine to them are definately a different and unique crowd. i badly wanted to do a documentary on them. the papers entirely filled the hatchback of my car. **i took a pic. see sunday's post.** the entire process took longer than i thought it would. the time on my car stereo read 3:15am.

linda has an awesome map made up for the route and i was very thankful for that. i took a napkin from the amigo's bag and jammed it into the latch of the hatchback so that it could not close. it would have been a pain to pull the hatch release lever to open it every time i stopped. i had no idea how i was going to do the paper route and knew that i could only sit there and come up with ideas. but nothing would play out until i started doing it. at first i tried driving up to each individual house, getting out, and tossing a paper on the porch. but that took too long. and i was worried about my car. stop, go, stop, go. DRIVE, PARK, DRIVE, PARK. i began to leave the car in neutral when i stopped and pulled the Ebrake to keep it still. i parked in the middle of the street and grabbed the papers i needed. to make things fun and to hurry along, i ran quite a bit. it was fun! i have this super bright flashlight that brittan gave me that i brought along. i needed it to see the map (dome light is burned out in my car and i've not changed the bulb) and some of the addresses on the houses would have been impossible to see without the flashlight. i saw two cats in windows and shined the light at them. their eyes glowed like cat eyes glow, but they did not move an inch. kings of their castles they were and not the least afraid of the paperboy. the lincoln journal star shorted me two papers so i picked up some from a newspaper machine after getting change at a walgreen's and drinking a ruby red grapefruit juice. i finished up (very anxious to) around 5:30 - 5:45am. almost 24 hours without sleep, on 4 1/2 hours of sleep.

it wasn't me who was keeping me going. and no, it wasn't drugs. i believe the lord listened to my, and others', prayers. though at any time i could have chosen to call it quits or lay down for a bit. the sun wasn't up yet but it was on its way up. i rushed home and made some hot tea and went out to watch it rise. i think i awoke jonathan in the commotion. i told him what i was doing and left. **look at the pics in sunday's post of the sunrise** home to shower then, off to church, watch caleb wallace fey's baptism, help out with children's church, stay for food and celebration for caleb and lori and kyle. i was invited to help move a piano but was getting to the point where i could hardly lift the plastic fork with food on it. i arrived home a little after 2 in the afternoon. i remember thinking, "it's sunday! i want to be with people!" i really wasn't tired, like sleep tired, but i was physically tired. pooped. i mean, I was pooped, not that i went number two.

i woke up at 5:55pm. and felt like i'd slept for days. i felt great. completely rejuvinated. i thought i'd lay back down though and keep resting. for two hours, it was off and on. then a decent hour of sleep. then an hour of just laying there awake...thinking. i got out of bed and blogged. the first piece of jonathan's pecan pie went to my stomach and i coupled it with some hot tea. jonathan called then. he was on his way home. i was about to head out to go dancing, but i wanted to stay and talk with him a bit. then, i went dancing. it was great. but i am sore today. too sore to ride my bike into work. shucks!

so this weekend i was up for 31 1/2 hours straight. the time was amazing! so much happened, so much went on. how many people did i interact with? many, many, many. it was so good. but two things: one, it's not good for one to stay up so long without sleep (any fool can tell you that) and two, i'm not doing another sunday morning paper route any time soon. cheers . . ..

23apr07 today's quote

the smallest bookstore still contains more ideas of worth than have been presented in the entire history of television.

-andrew ross-

hot tea, birds chirping, even pheasants calling. and a sunrise.

i completed the sunday paper route that i volunteered to do for the andersons around 5:30 to 5:45 this morning. the entire process started at 2am with showing up downtown at the lincoln journal star to get the papers. they were bundled in bundles of 30. i had to put the comics, advertisements, and the classified sections in the main part of the paper, then fold it, and then put it in a bag. about 140 papers. whew! here is a pic of all the papers filling the hatchback of my car. it didn't turn out too well because there wasn't enough light...and it's with my mobile.

since it was pretty early morning when i arrived home, the sun wasn't even up yet. but it was about to come up. i figured i haven't watched the sunrise in a long time. i mean, really watch it come up. not just seeing it while driving, or just catching a glimpse of the last of it. i quick made some hot tea and headed out not quite a half mile away. i sat atop a hill and listened to the birds who were also awake this early. there were so many of them and it sounded to me like the world should sound. there was only a slight breeze. i even heard two pheasants calling to each other. one, was within 50 feet of me. and a robin sat atop a fence post and questioned why i was out in this field on this hill. i turned to see him and he remained on his post for a short while longer. i didn't feel he was frightened of me in the least. i took some pictures with my mobile, so they're far from excellent photographs, but they capture the changing brightness. too bad it was cloudy. i did not get to see the great ball of fire we call our sun.

the pictures were each taken about three minutes apart. i can't remember the exact time of the first one, but i would guess about 6:10 - 6:15am. it was sooooooo nice to just sit there and think of the incredibly long day i've had and all the good and fun things that happened. i think it was a great way to start worship today. and there wasn't a thing i could have done to make the sun come up any faster. i had to be patient, wait for it...ENJOY IT. you see, god gave me nothing but time this morning to enjoy this beautiful thing. for that, i am thankful. to everyone i know and love, please have an outstanding night. i hope your week finishes well. and start it out well tomorrow. cheers . . ..

22apr07 today's quote

bicycling is the nearest approximation I know to the flight of birds. the airplane simply carries a man on its back like an obedient pegasus; it gives him no wings of his own.

-louis j helle jr-

it's caturday!

21apr07 today's quote

roses are red,
violets are... well, violet.
if it weren't for the transposition of the "i" and the "o",
violet would rhyme with toilet.

this blog's for you grandma

my grandmother is awesome! i spent a lot of time with her when i was younger. didn't know it then, but now i am so thankful for it. grandma grew up on a farm, lived through the depression, taught in a one room school house, gardens, faithfully loved her husband, gives soooo graciously, and cooks some mean apple cinnamon roll pull apart thingies. :drool:

i admire my grandmother for seeing my ornery-ness and mischievousness and letting it play out when i was a little boy. i discovered a lot from it and am thankful grandma didn't shelter me. there's so much knowledge and experience i gained from it. she was there the whole time though. when i jammed the pitch fork into my calf (on two seperate occasions), got the bees mad enough to chase me and sting me seven times, and when i cut a good portion of my finger off, grandma was there. she was there with love, care, and that look in her eyes that said, "you're such a boy and so imaginative." she would have the look of sterness that she knew i'd get, and that it was all that was needed to understand what went wrong, but the whole time she'd be on the brink of laughing at the situation.

i love how grandma doesn't worry about many things. she's so darn confident that things will work out for the best. do you know what comfort there is in someone who trusts that things will be okay? it's calming, soothing, comfortable, soft, and safe. grandma has a tremendous faith in christ. i admire her trust.

grandma, i love you. cheers . . ..

20apr07 today's quote

i'm convinced that every boy, in his heart, would rather steal second base than an automobile.

-tom clark-

this blog's for you brittan rosendahl

excellent friend and fellow punker. great photographer. unrivaled sense of humor. and more undetected kills than you can shake a stick at. pretty cool dude. thanks... for everything, ever. i now display some of your photos. har!



keep texas exciting. cheers . . ..

19apr07 today's quote

you miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

-wayne gretzky-

this blog's for you heather lea mullen

i recently checked heather's blog (here: http://heatherleamullen.blogspot.com/) and noticed at the very top of the Some Great Reading column is this:

My man's photos

yes. that is awesome...in so many ways. ;) heather, you rock! cheers . . ..

18apr07 today's quote

for myself I hold no preferences among flowers, so long as they are wild, free, spontaneous. bricks to all greenhouses! black thumb and cutworm to the potted plant!

-edward abbey-

this blog's for you lori fey

you had mentioned sunday that you wish you could have the english is an odd language stuff in writing. here it is.


let's face it. english is an odd language.

there is no egg in eggplant,
no ham in hamburger,
and neither pine nor apple in pineapple.

english muffins aren't muffins at all and weren't even invented in england.
guinnea pigs aren't from guinnea...and they're not even pigs.

if writers write, how come fingers don't fing?
if the teacher taught, did the preacher praught?
and if the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth?

and there's more!

if vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
why do people recite at a play yet play at a recital?
how come we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
send something by car and it's a shipment, but send it by ship and it's cargo?
and have noses that run and feet that smell?

how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same thing?
how can the weather be hot as hell on one day and cold as hell on another?

ever notice we talk about things only when they're absent? think about it.
have you ever seen a horseful carriage? or a strapful gown?
ever met a sung hero? or experienced requited love?
have you ever run into somebody who was combobulated? ruly? or just plain gruntled?
and where are all those people who ARE spring chickens or who WOULD hurt a fly?

you have to laugh at the unique lunacy of a language where a house burns up as it burns down.
in which you fill in a form by filling it out.
and an alarm is on only when it goes off.

well, english was invented by people, not computers. and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which of course, isn't a race at all).

that is why when the stars are out, they are visible,
but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
and when i wind up my watch, it starts,
but when i wind up this poem, it ends.


there you go. now you can read it at your own pace. ;)

it is such a nice day. and yesterday was also such a nice day. i wish everyone could get together and we'd go sailing. yeah! have a swell day. cheers . . ..

17apr07 today's quote

i'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck.

-emma goldman-

this blog's for you ben taylor

all week long, i will be blogging in dedication to someone. ben, this is the video i was telling you about as we were leaving lincoln friday. this guy is driving SO fast and weaving in and out of cars...IT'S AWESOME! it seems the taylors like to drive the same way. ;)

late for work video, CLICK HERE!

oh, and the music is a riot! hope you like. cheers . . ..

16apr07 today's quote

to know what is right and not do it is the worst cowardice.

-confucius-

well. let's see. so far we've reached...

wow! 155 posts already this year, and it's only the middle of april. two posts a day for the most part. :raisesglass: to the next 155 posts! thank you for reading everyone. cheers . . ..

15apr07 today's quote

all that i have seen teaches me to trust the creator for all i have not seen.

-ralph waldo emerson-

i'd use every synonomous word with great, or good, to describe this weekend.

AND IT'S NOT OVER YET! holy cow! lit night was great. the taylors are great. my time in norfolk was great. there was so much food! i ate like a king. two kings! i'd say between fifteen and twenty people were there throughout the night. i read first, a letter i'd written but never sent. there were so many good reads! trish and i were partners again in hand and foot. and we won. i believe it is the first time that i've won. didn't get to bed 'till a little after 3am. more king-like food was to be had for breakfast. and i put 13 pieces into place of a 9000 piece puzzle. in my head, i figured out that i helped assemble 13/45 of 1% of the puzzle (the puzzle is so large that it is being assembled in halves).

when i got back to lincoln this afternoon, i tried to rehearse the comedy routine i was going to do in the talent show. being the king of second guessing, i rearranged some things, took out some things, and added some new things. i think the "final copy" ended up pretty bits-and-piecy. i was a little nervous but kept positive. lots of people laughed. it made me warm. i'm smiling still. i feel bad for those who missed the talent show. and i'm sad for those who voluntarily didn't show up. it was soooooooo great. every act was really, really good. boredom couldn't have been spotted for miles. there was clapping, and woo hoo-ing, and laughing. i am so amazed by the talents i saw tonight. and the crowd was great, too. hopefully, this talent show thing turns into some kind of tradition.

went to mike's for ice cream. talked with elijah about his trip in june. left before adam showed up. adam rules (he showed me how to make a sparkler bomb). called adam. arrived at the davy's. watched the movie prestige at the davy's. had a bowl of cereal when i got home. blogged. and am now going to bed. i am still smiling. what an awesome weekend!!! and sunday is still yet to come. wowie! i am so thankful for all of this. this week i've been down on myself but time and time again, the lord has shown his faithfulness. blessing, after blessing, after blessing. growth. understanding. it's just further proof to me that he never backs down. he's always at it. always being there. have a wonderful rest everyone. how can i sleep with such excitement inside me? cheers . . ..

14apr07 today's quote

it's a poor sort of memory that only works backwards.

-lewis carroll-

it's friday the thirteenth, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

this is perhaps the most superstitous day of the year. some things to watch out for:


^this guy
^and this guy
^and don't do this

tonight i will be missing the get together at the welstead's. i'm going to miss the food and the people. but i've been invited up to norfolk to take part in literary night. i'm excited. it sounds fun and there's been nothing but good hype about it. tonight will be the fourth night in a row that i've been out doing something. weeeeeee! tomorrow night is the talent show and that will be the fifth night in a row. weeeeeeeeeee! and there's always sunday night dancing, so that will make six in a row. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! (funny how when you're excited, you refer to yourself as three or more people.) this week has been full to say the least. oh, and news of sorts. i may be working at yia yia's or oso burrito soon. we'll see what comes of it. have a swell 13th all. cheers . . ..

13apr07 today's quote

forgiveness is the fragrance the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.

-mark twain-

what's your take on poodles?

i don't mind them. i think they're great dogs...if they're left alone to be great dogs. but owners get to them and carve off all their hair except for the standard puff around each paw, on the end of the tail, and the absolute worst - the feau afro/mane on their heads. i imagine the self esteem of poodles is the lowest of all the dogs. cheers . . ..

12apr07 today's quote

a rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral.

-antoine de saint-exupéry-

news flash: TALENT SHOW @ GRACE CHAPEL SATURDAY 14APR07 @ 7PM

"we're going live now to jimmy who's at grace chapel in lincolncity, nebraska. we hear you've got some big news jimmy".

"that's right bob. there's a talent show here in lincolncity this saturday. bob, you heard me right. A TALENT SHOW. it's being held at grace chapel which is right on the corner of 40th street and sheridan boulevard. i believe it's just about the easiest place to find in all of lincolncity."

"jimmy, that sounds really fun. what will be going on there?"

"well bob, scottie b is doing stand up comedy, eric tonges has a band and they'll be playing, many other things too and some french gypsies will be there juggling poodles, and bob, get this, someone has hinted that maybe, just maybe, there will be ducks playing the xylophone. i tell you bob, i'm so excited i can hardly wait."

(laughing in agreeance)"i'm right there with you jimmy. i plan to attend. i'm even letting my friends know so we all can show up together. what time is the talent show?"

"it's being advertised as starting at 7pm. but inside sources tell me bob that it will start at 7pm." (snicker)

"that's really not funny at all jimmy. looks like YOU won't be doing any stand up comedy."

(both laughing)

"thanks so much for the report jimmy. well there you have it folks. the newest and latest in fun and entertainment happenings in lincolncity, nebraska. this talent show sounds to be an amazing time. jimmy tells me any funds raised will be going towards those doing missions work this year. it doesn't get any better than that. so, saturday we all at channel 5 news hope to see you at grace chapel. maybe you'll get a spot on the saturday evening news?"

grace chapel, saturday, 7pm. B there or B []. cheers . . ..

11apr07 today's quote

if a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.

-dave barry-

actual newspaper ads

these are funny!

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites.

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

FREE PUPPIES...Mother, AKC German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog...able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG.
Looks like a rat; been out a while.
Better be a reward.

COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also, 1 gay bull for sale.

NORDIC TRACK
$300 Hardly used, call Chubby.

GEORGIA PEACHES
California grown - 89 cents lb.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer $300.

cheers . . ..

10apr07 today's quote

a bird does not sing because it has an answer. it sings because it has a song.

-chinese proverb-

two well done anti-speeding commercials

anti speeding commercial #1

anti speeding commercial #2

i think these videos are done really, really well. i like cinematography that is slowed down somewhat. the videos might make your stomach a little squeamish, but i don't think they're too bad. definately reminds you to watch your speed and to pay attention while driving. cheers . . ..

09apr07 today's quote

prosperity is not without many fears and distastes, and adversity is not without comforts and hopes.

-sir francis bacon-

there was no easter bunny this year

nor was there any mention of one. i think that's the first time in my life. i can honestly say i didn't miss it. my sister and i chuckled over my joking of it though. i had asked if the easter bunny came 'round. she said no. she is 16 and i know full well she understands the fairy tale of the easter bunny, knowing it's not real in the least. when she said no, i told her that i had some bad news. "the easter bunny was hit by a semi truck earlier this morning. squashed to a bloody pulp, he was. i'm sorry holly. there won't be an easter bunny this year or from now on." we both laughed. she knew that i knew she didn't believe in the easter bunny and that i also was only saying the intentional brutal story to get a laugh out of us both. i appreciate her.

it apppears my mother did not go into her work today as she thought she might. i'm glad of that. she works too much anyway and i had a feeling that her going into work was really her running away from something else - namely family. i don't feel my mother's self esteem is very high right now. hopefully, the nice weather, the sun shining, good food, my father brother and sister, and the greatness of christ's resurrection have lifted that some. holly tells me that mother made food and everyone ate it. usually, though, we go out to the farm. my grandmother still went out and some cousins from out of town were back, too. funny still, that mom didn't go. i wonder what's eating at her? she's not one to talk of these things...pretty closed off like the rest of my family.

i was late to the greeter position this morning. i didn't sleep worth a damn last night. even though i got out of bed with plenty of time to spare, i spent too much time worrying over what to wear. yes. really. i don't have much of a wardrobe and was being self-conscious about what to wear. i felt bad for having to wear a shirt i wore a week and a half ago. and after trying on something else, and going back and forth, back and forth, jonathan asked if i was watching the time. i was. but it was a gentle kick in the pants. thanks jg.

the service was great. for years i've heard the exact same easter service at my parents' catholic church. i can quote some parts by heart. that's sad. sad because it hasn't changed. "so you don't believe that jesus really rose from the dead, huh? you say he couldn't have because of this? or he couldn't have because of that?" wait! wait! mr priest. i DO believe he rose from the dead. why are you being straight out accusational? and you do this every year. okay... back to grace chapel, lincoln, nebraska, the 8th of april 2007. the breakfast between services was amazing. thanks to all who chipped in with that. we sang jesus loves me and this little light of mine with the kiddies in children's church. jake and i went to the hsu's after plans (or lack of plans) fell through with the smith's. jake, you worry me some times. you can be awfully quiet. at times, i'm hesitant to begin talking. that's okay. you'll open up in due time. i'm glad you came along and hope you were full. it was fun playing with the kids there. i'm looking forward to a nap. and then i'll eat some more. probably check email at that time, too. then off to dance the night away. boy oh boy! full days are the best. i can't wait to hear how everyone's easter went. i bet everyone had a blast! cheers . . ..

08apr07 today's quote

bread and water can easily be toast and tea.

easter eve

i am really looking forward to tomorrow. there will be a pot luck breakfast between services and it's the first easter with church family and not family family. so i'm excited. i hope everyone has a fantastic weekend! see everyone later. cheers . . ..

07apr07 today's quote

laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face.

-victor hugo-

good friday was good

i spent the majority of the day with people. that was a big part of making today so great. i just got back from scott and gina's. WOW! what a fun crazy time. i laughed so much! now my face is sore. ring! rung! lol. cheers . . ..

06apr07 today's quote

be glad that you're greedy; the national economy would collapse if you weren't.

-mignon mclaughlin- 1966

today's episode: blogger's block? or too many topics to pick from?

i'm not sure. it seems hard to start blogging today. i guess not because i've not much to blog about, but what do i want to blog about? well. i want to blog about everything that's on my mind and heart right now. but that's not practical. and additionally, i don't know if i can put down some of the stuff even though i want it to be known. these things aren't bad things, so please don't worry about that. they are the things one wants others to know and understand, and then to be comforted. okay. hold this thought. i think i just figured out what to blog.

they are the things one wants others to know and understand, and then to be comforted. that's how i'm feeling. like the want to be heard, to shout out and have someone come running... to just cry and be held.

i babysat for lori and kyle this morning. lori had to run to the dentist and kyle was at school. caleb is about a few months old and my current favorite baby. he is the cutest thing. you'll fall in love with his eyes when you see them. they are so big! and beautiful. a darker blue with maybe a hint of grey which makes them look purple, to me. caleb was sleeping when lori left. he awoke a short time later and was squirming. i played with him in his swing for a little bit. when he started to squirm a little more, i picked him up. i didn't want the little guy to be uncomfortable. i sat on the couch and was helping him stand up on my knees. he was making some very cute mouth movements and smiling and kind-of-laughing.

and i just melted. i felt very good inside, very happy. it's a hard feeling to describe and one i've felt before. right then though, the world is just wonderful.

it's great to show babies things, teach them, and interact with them. i'm glad lori had music playing. i think that's important for children. she had warned me caleb might have gas. he began to get a little fussy. just a little. i didn't want crying. baby crying = kryptonite. i crumble. caleb received joyful, little bounces and little pats on the back in my effort to convince the gas to join our atmosphere. i didn't hear anything (or smell anything) and he became more and more fussy. then the crying came on. but just a short burst here. then another there. but it's crippling to see a baby in discomfort. i'm a softy. i got some water and i put it in the microwave and pressed start. about halfway done, caleb got quiet. "hmmm...perhaps he's alright?" nope. then he started to fuss again. *ding!* i knew it would be just a little while longer for the bottle to be warmed up after putting it in the heated water. i walked with caleb around the living room softly letting him know i understood he was hungry and that food was warming up. i told him it was okay he was crying and letting me know he wanted food. the bottle wasn't quite warm enough the first time i checked so i kept up the gentle bouncing, rocking, and swaying with caleb until the bottle was warmed to the proper temperature. then i lay caleb in my arm like you lay a baby to be fed. he didn't take the bottle right away. just cried. "uh-oh. if he's not hungry, then what else can i do to help the little guy?" there was just a hint of worry at this point.

but then caleb took the bottle. i guess, after all, he IS a baby. probably wouldn't immediately calm down and know a bottle was there. i got his blanket for support and cushion and go back to the couch. i sat down. caleb was feeding. now here's the part that got me...

caleb was looking right into my eyes. yeah. so wonderful it made my eyes water. can you get any more perfect than that? god has ordered this wonderful way! a mother holds her child. the way her arms are and the way a baby lay in them results in his feet being lower than his head. he is at an incline and comfortable. right next to the baby's head? the mother's bosom. the baby has to turn his head just a wee bit and while feeding his face is looking RIGHT UP AT HIS MOTHER'S.

UGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

IT
IS
THE
MOST
BEAUTIFUL
THING!

mother and child. the god of the universe. the beauty. my heart that can't take it. the only part that is hard about all this is my longing for it. i want to see my wife with child. i want to bounce my son or daughter on my lap. holding each other, i want to be with my wife as we tip toe away from the crib after just laying the baby down. and yes, i want to deal with the crying and the messes.

so that's today's blog. that's what is on my heart. i'm going to cook up something for a pot luck later tonight, pray, and take a nap before i get off to work. everyone have a great day. it's a good one. cheers . . ..

05apr07 today's quote

the robbed that smiles, steals something from the thief.

-william shakespeare-

no one says loving doesn't hurt

my good friend tiffiny called yesterday morning. she was talking about things she's doing, very active in her faith. i think of tiffiny and what the lord has done in her life and it warms my heart. it was impossible not to be smiling at that moment. (tiffiny, you've still left the best message EVER in the history of answer phone messages).

well, with the warmth in my heart i began to think about some of my friends. the ones who are like what i used to be like. that's when it started to hurt. i don't think you hurt as much as when you love. it reminded me of the second mural i ever spray painted (illegally). i did this one along the bike trail that runs under the hwy 77 overpass. sorry, i don't have pics.

the man whispered,
"god, speak to me."
and a meadowlark sang.

but the man did not hear.

the man yelled,
"god, speak to me!"
and the thunder rolled across the sky.

but the man did not listen.

the man looked around and said,
"god, let me see you."
and a star shined brightly.

but the man did not see.

and the man shouted,
"god, show me a miracle!"
and a life was born.

but the man did not notice.

so the man cried out in despair,
"touch me god and let me know you are here."

whereupon god reached down,
and touched the man.
but the man brushed the butterfly away
and walked on.

i've always said "love is caring more for their needs than my wants." but when you do that, when you want the best for someone, or hope for something better, you risk pain. you risk hurting. but it's a good kind of hurt. the kind that draws even more love. but it's still hurt and that makes loving tough. perhaps that's why so many choose not to love. they want the amount of hurt in their lives to be zero. hmmm... i'm going to think about that. cheers . . ..

04apr07 today's quote

let men tremble to win the hand of a woman, unless they win along with it the utmost passion of her heart! else it may be their miserable fortune, when some mightier touch than their own may have awakened all her sensibilities, to be reproached even for the calm content, the marble image of happiness, which they will have imposed upon her as the warm reality.

-nathaniel hawthorn- (taken from the scarlet letter)

funny words

i love to hear them because they make me laugh.

hodgepodge
perriwinkle
cattywompus
cockamaymie
shenanigans
malarchy
titmouse
hoagie
jowls
femur
haggel
omomatopœia

oh there's lots more, i just can't think of them right now. for a little while, brittan and i had a list going on our refridgerator. i wonder whatever happened to that? feel free to add any you have. cheers . . ..

03apr07 today's quote

it's always darkest before the dawn. so if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

red rover, red rover send officer smith right over

this was just too funny not to post. every night after 80's night there exists the presence of the lincoln police department. typically, their cars are parked right in the middle of o street and they roam up and down the sidewalk. i believe they appear in an effort to dissuade violence and also to nab any drunkards. from my experience at 80's night over the past years is that i've a better chance of winning the lottery than seeing a fight break out there. as for the drunkards? well, it's a little more occasional to see one who's had too much, but i couldn't set my watch to it or say it's routine in any way.

anyway, the cops' presence often leads to humorous chit chat amongst some of the dancers. last night, all the cops were on the OTHER side of the street, all in a line, looking at all us dancers. i overheard someone making the comment that this was like that red rover game we all played in grade school. i had a very good laugh from that and from the comical image i came up with in my head of it playing out.

last night was very fun. there were some people at work that showed up to dance. that was great! because i feel i know them a little better now. i also ran into renee welstead's brother (mark). he and i went to a party at a house where brittan and i used to live. we ended up talking to our friend jerry about free will and influences society has on our choices. also, right and wrong came up. jerry isn't a christian and doesn't believe in free will. he's also quite stubborn. mark said his head hurt afterward. lol!

oh! and the moon! DID YOU SEE THE MOON?! it was sooooooo big and bright last night. and the way the few, wispy clouds drifted in front of it and began to glow just dropped my jaw to the ground in amazement of its magnificence. i felt so little, and humble, in the great presence of this beautiful heavenly body showing itself to me. oh how i love the nighttime sky! cheers . . ..

02apr07 today's quote

"give us this day our daily bread" is probably the most perfectly constructed and useful sentence ever set down in the english language.

-pj wingate-

angelic? powerful? both.

i went to an a cappella choir concert at concordia university today. HOLY COW! it was amazing. there were so many sounds filling the room at once! they were rising and falling and go from here to there. i felt like i was on a wild horse galluping and jumping up and down, then slowing down, prancing, speeding up faster and faster, up and down...sudden stop. stillness. then a sudden spring to action! wow! so fun!

there was such a fullness to the sound, such a power to it. oh! and the women singing! :swoon: it was absolutely angelic. there was brass, too. my favorite song (jesus loves me) was played. the last song was a hymn that everyone joined in on, the audience included. to quote megan, "that was the most triumphant thing i have ever heard". and it was. i am so glad i had a chance to experience it. cheers . . ..

01apr07 today's quote

obstacles are like wild animals. they are cowards but they will bluff you if they can. if they see you are afraid of them... they are liable to spring upon you; but if you look them squarely in the eye, they will slink out of sight.

-orison swett marden-